Posted on Posted in Relationships, Stories that Touch

Idehen and Esosa had been dating (or sort of) for about five months. The terms of the relationship were not exactly defined. The titles boyfriend and girlfriend were hardly ever used. When Idehen approached Esosa to tell her that he liked her and thought she was perfect for him, Esosa knew it wasn’t a relationship based on mushy lovey-dovey feelings; it was a relationship out of convenience. Idehen wasn’t bad too, He had a good job, nice car, good educational background and good family background. Let us not forget he’s also from Edo! These were a few of the things Esosa thought about the first time Idehen told her that he wanted to be more than just friends.

Idehen wasn’t sure what to expect from Esosa; she seemed like a good girl – actually, she was a good girl unlike the other wild girls he had been with, She was well behaved, decent, smart, funny, and always going to church. She was the kind of woman he wanted to make babies with. She had good genes which was very obvious. He hoped everyday that his relationship with Esosa would be more concrete and finally got around to expressing this to her. Her reaction came as a surprise to her as she blurted out looking disgusted, “I am not ready to get married, You look like you are looking for a wife. Biko I do not need any pressure from anybody.” Idehen eventually got Esosa to understand that he wasn’t in a hurry even though he was way older. They both agreed to “See How It Goes”.

Idehen Started “Seeing How It Goes” with Esosa with the purest of intentions… He was perfect at first; bought her gifts, wanted to always talk to her, he even mentioned her to his mum. He was going to do it right this time but as time went by, it seemed like he was taking Esosa for granted. Idehen never expected that Esosa would be the type to have sex before marriage… but she did! Sex was allowed in the relationship and he didn’t mind that (Actually, he loved it!) He just didn’t expect Esosa to agree to that. Maybe the sex made him have more feelings for Esosa but there were just so many other girls that were doing more for him than Esosa even tried to do.

There was Titilope who always called, brought food for him, and cleaned his house. Esosa would only complain half the time she tried to make a little effort to clean. There was the light skinned Adaeze who was always ready to spend on him. There was also Katherine “with a K” who was crazy about him. All these girls made it obvious that they were interested in him but Esosa who would obey him in the past and was always nice had suddenly developed wings. She suddenly became so unforgiving and disrespectful. She didn’t even call as often anymore, but when she did, it was often because she was upset with him. She kept turning down invitations to his house unlike before when she was always eager to come over. It was bad enough he couldn’t even say for sure if she was his girlfriend or if he had any right to be jealous of that guy who had been paying her a lot of attention. and now this?

Idehen wasn’t sure of a lot of things because they were only just “Seeing How It Goes” and to be fair, he was comfortable and happy about the fact that there were no strict rules and the relationship was not so defined… but to what end? Idehen looked at the message he sent to Esosa five hours ago; she had not replied yet she was online. Did he have the right to nag since they were just “Seeing How It Goes”.

Esosa was also getting tired of Idehen; he didn’t call as often anymore. She was getting tired of the whole “Seeing How It Goes”. Maybe it was her fault since she said she wasn’t ready to be serious or married but it was not an excuse for Idehen to treat her the way he did. Maybe he was seeing someone else. It could be Titilope… but then Idehen could do better than that girl that behaves like a househelp. Adaeze has a lot of money but Idehen said she is not his type.

Katherine is just plain crazy… not possible.

Esosa did not think Idehen was cheating.


Esosa wasn’t even sure she could use that word – he was not exactly her boyfriend… or was he?  Esosa was beginning to want more and she was going to make Idehen see that she cannot be taken for granted. Idehen had never paid Esosa a visit, so she decided not to step into his house till he visited her. She was beginning to care more than she should for Idehen and she knew she shouldn’t have had sex with him. Idehen was not treating her right.  She is a smart beautiful well-behaved young girl any man should feel lucky and privileged to have her even pay attention to him. Timothy probably knew this, maybe that’s why he had been trying so hard to please her. If she indulged Timothy, would she be cheating? She kissed him when he dropped her off after ice-cream yesterday… was that cheating? Surely Idehen must have done the same at some point?

Esosa was beginning to overthink, “This Seeing How It Goes is stressing me out, and I don’t like stress” she said as she replied Idehen’s text after five hours.

She had to portray that she didn’t care about Idehen that much. She knew she would get hurt soon. “Seeing How It Goes” was definitely not working.



Do you think Esosa and Idehen will work out their issues and their S.H.I.G would yield good results?

Is Esosa really a good girl?

Who do you blame for the downturn of this relationship?

Why do we have a lot of undefined relationships today?

Is Having an undefined relationship easier than defining it?

Is age (i.e being young) an excuse to not define a relationship?

Does S.H.I.G work? Can you S.H.I.G into a committed relationship?

What is a better title for this story?

Is S.H.I.G different from being friends with benefits?

Is it still S.H.I.G if there was no Sex in the relationship?

Does Sex make the S.H.I.G Relationship different?

Further questions? Please drop them in the comments section below!!! 


Columnist Bio
T.UZUMAKI (ig:t.uzumaki) A sage and member of the Uzumaki Clan  Anime 
Lover - quite obvious to fellow anime lovers.  Environmental Enthusiast- In love 
with mother earth. God Lover- For he gave me all my powers and I owe it all to him I 
like junk food and I do not get bored easily (because very busy mind!)

6 thoughts on “[STORIES THAT TOUCH] THE S.H.I.G

  1. Happens too often, two people have the same thoughts but not to speak out loud when they should. Good results could come when they do if it hasn’t imploded yet.
    What is Good?? Good is relative, wouldn’t you agree??
    Undefined is actually easier until it’s not – someone wants more, another doesn’t. then KaBoom.
    S.H.I.G is convenient . I really dont know if it can lead to commitance – Jury is still out.
    The sex makes all the difference, it sets the expiry date so to speak.
    Good one T.

    1. Nice tale. I’m educated and entertained. The best way to say you don’t know what you want is to let’s ” see how it goes”. Focus has always been the fastest route to stability and the lack of it will wear you down.
      Esosa could be a good girl by the standards of a ” see how it goes” relationship. But she also knows that she’s not being treated well and that she hasn’t treated Idehen well either, that is why the question lingers.
      the couple has to take responsibility of deciding what they both want for a S.H.I.G to become a committed relationship.

  2. I have really been pondering on this new outlook to life SHIG see how it goes and that is why I ask the question if Esosa is a committed Christian. I think this policy leaves God out of the situation and it is totally carnal and dangerous. Do you set out on a journey without knowing or have an idea of where you are going to? Do you go to school without knowing or have an idea about the certificate you want to obtain? Why then will you go into a relationship into which you give all of yourself (on both sides and commit sin- Fornication) still with S.H..I.G? This is too costly a prize I think. T what do you think?

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